1. You don’t have friends, you have panas.

You also use the term mi costilla (my rib) because your friends are part of you and you love them from the bottom of your heart. This is the kind of friend who comes to your rescue after you’ve had a traffic accident, checks up on you when you’re sick, and paid for lunch that month you were completely broke. Its also the kind of friend who walks into your house as if it were his/her own, chats with your parents while opening the fridge, and then lies in your bed with his/her shoes on. I.e., your dearest p ana del alma.

2. Your life philosophy is “como vaya viniendo, vamos viendo.”

Venazuelans don’t plan too much, they like it when things just flow. You can’t be surprise if the trip to the |Andes ended up on a beach in Maracaibo.

3. You’re certain that the arepa is the best breakfast in the world.

A Venezuelan has an arepa once a week., to give a conservative estimate. There’s nothing like a homemade arepita with meat and yellow cheese. Or the New Year’s Day breakfast with a huge pork arepa and gravy spilling all over it. For some, the reina pepiada is a classic after a night of rumba. There’s a favorite for each and everyone.

3. You can stand the chalequeo.

Chalequeo might sounds like other Spanish words, such as chaleco or chaqueta, but it has nothing to do with either. It means teasing or annoying someone. And you.. you can stand it.

4. Your everyday speech is full of idioms, sarcasm and exaggerations.

It’ll be easier just to ask “can you please move so i can see the tv?” but you prefer to yell “la carne de burro no es transparente!” (Donkey’s meat isn’t transparent, you know?) If you think someone is been a smart ass, you say “Careful, you’re gonna hit by an ice-cream truck” or “You’re gonna get hit by a teddy bear.”

5. You use the words chevere and arrecho to define al things God created.

If you’re having a great time at a party, or if you find a person to be attractive, you describe them as chevere. If something bothers you, you feel arrecho, but also, the newest 4×4 fully loaded esta arrechisima.

6. Marico-huevon is an essential term in the male vocabulary.

If you’re a guy from Venezuela, you use marico-huevon at least 10 times when chatting with your panas. it’s not offensive. No, not at all, it’s super normal.

7. The party always start three hours later.

Venezuelan are unpunctual from the time they’re born. Everybody knows that if the invitation says 8pm, you’ll arrive at 10 but the party will only really get going after midnight.

8. After the first shared drink, everyone is like your brother.

A pana is the one who saved your ass (te salvo la patria, really) that time you had no more ice for rum. After that, that person became your bro. A true Vene starts a brotherhood with whoever he or she shares drinks, dinner, meaningful conversation, or a trip to the beach with.

9. You know “getting off the mule” is related to your finances.

Another calssic of storytelling: Me tuve que bajar de la mula con 10 palos. A long time ago, having a mule was a sign of status. If you owed money to someone, that person would say something like “If you can’t pay, at least get off the mule.”

10. Gas isn’t an item in your monthly budget.

Gas is so cheap that when you have to fill up the tanks, you just collect the coins lying around your backseat. With that, you not only pay, you also tip the guy at the gas pump so he can buy himself a coffee. According to Global Petrol Prices, a liter of petrol in Venezuela cost $0.02, so basically nobody takes that into consideration when planning expenses.